Vadgepquaf Yartomtin is a god.

It takes the form of a six thousand metre long, impressive mole.

Vadgepquaf Yartomtin created a down quark six billion years ago.

If you believe in Vadgepquaf Yartomtin, it will visit you to thank you.

If you do not believe in Vadgepquaf Yartomtin, it will not care.

Vadgepquaf Yartomtin's most sacred site is Pisterzo in Italy.

Vadgepquaf Yartomtin's Holy Commandments

1. Never talk about electromagnetism near frogs while wearing violet coats and balancing six platinum spheres on your chest.

2. Always help squirrels.

3. Erect a giant carbon sculpture of Vadgepquaf Yartomtin in the centre of the settlement.

4. Never sit near goats.

5. Never wear hats.