Dodhotmin Sabpagtabsagsanfadfud Loggadyat is a god.

He takes the form of a gargantuan, annoying pig.

Dodhotmin Sabpagtabsagsanfadfud Loggadyat created an up quark two trillion years ago.

If you believe in Dodhotmin Sabpagtabsagsanfadfud Loggadyat, he will be happy.

If you do not believe in Dodhotmin Sabpagtabsagsanfadfud Loggadyat, he will attempt to scare you with floods.

Dodhotmin Sabpagtabsagsanfadfud Loggadyat's most sacred site is Nanjie in China.

Dodhotmin Sabpagtabsagsanfadfud Loggadyat's Holy Commandments

1. Dodhotmin Sabpagtabsagsanfadfud Loggadyat loves horses, so they must be respected.

2. Never eat bark.

3. Never talk about manatees.

4. Do not commit murder.

5. Your grandchildren must be taught to worship Dodhotmin Sabpagtabsagsanfadfud Loggadyat.