Nak is a god.

It takes the form of an extremely heavy, sapient narwhal.

Nak created tapeworms eight quadrillion years ago.

If you believe in Nak, it will give you the power of flight.

If you do not believe in Nak, it will name a particularly small and pointless asteroid after you.

Nak's most sacred site is Zlatolist in Bulgaria.

Nak's Holy Commandments

1. Look mercifully on unfortunate great tits.

2. Never eat bark.

3. Never write about dwarf planets.

4. Show mercy to disobedient children.

5. Always pray immersed in water.