Kadkangom is a god.

It takes the form of a massive, temperamental alligator.

Kadkangom created light three thousand years ago.

If you believe in Kadkangom, it will ignore you forever.

If you do not believe in Kadkangom, it will send five hundred and sixty eight geese to peck you to death.

Kadkangom's most sacred site is Kirumampakkam in India.

Kadkangom's Holy Commandments

1. Do not listen to heathen tongues.

2. Do not shave your head.

3. Kadkangom loves sharks, so they must be respected.

4. Erect a large silver sculpture of Kadkangom on top of all buildings.

5. Do not covet oxen.