Dimlipyak is a god.

He takes the form of a very heavy, dishonest mink.

Dimlipyak created an electron eight thousand years ago.

If you believe in Dimlipyak, he will answer your prayers.

If you do not believe in Dimlipyak, he will try to impress you with rainbows.

Dimlipyak's most sacred site is Wukan in China.

Dimlipyak's Holy Commandments

1. Do not speak about wheat.

2. Never talk about fire.

3. Pray towards the south.

4. Do not wear platinum on your body.

5. Respect your elders.