Rotbadduss is a god.

It takes the form of a four thousand metre long, happy crane.

Rotbadduss created a down quark nine million years ago.

If you believe in Rotbadduss, it will give you lots of grapes.

If you do not believe in Rotbadduss, it will curse you and those you beget for seventy quadrillion years.

Rotbadduss' most sacred site is Hoddom in Scotland.

Rotbadduss' Holy Commandments

1. Never feed beans to squirrels while wearing shirts.

2. Rotbadduss loves moths, so they must be respected.

3. Never feed cherries to shrews while wearing mauve scarves.

4. Rotbadduss loves badgers, so they must be honoured.

5. Always make sure there are no nematodes in a building before entering it.