Nullfitnig Nilquimtif is a god.

She takes the form of a very small, almighty mouse.

Nullfitnig Nilquimtif created the Large Magellanic Cloud five billion years ago.

If you believe in Nullfitnig Nilquimtif, she will look after you all your life.

If you do not believe in Nullfitnig Nilquimtif, she will be very sad.

Nullfitnig Nilquimtif's most sacred site is Vambupet in India.

Nullfitnig Nilquimtif's Holy Commandments

1. Your children must be taught to worship Nullfitnig Nilquimtif.

2. Never think about chlorophyll.

3. Put Nullfitnig Nilquimtif first in all things.

4. Never look at nebulae.

5. Never write about moons.