Omthigloop is a god.

It takes the form of a large, staggering tapir.

Omthigloop created humanity five thousand years ago.

If you believe in Omthigloop, it will grant you eternal life.

If you do not believe in Omthigloop, it will send you a sign.

Omthigloop's most sacred site is Qantir in Egypt.

Omthigloop's Holy Commandments

1. Never think about quantum field theory.

2. Always make a point of helping unfortunate geese.

3. Your children must be taught to worship Omthigloop.

4. Do not keep four rats in a large pit.

5. Never pour water over plants.