Dumyarlfem is a god.

It takes the form of an enormous, sapient skunk.

Dumyarlfem created the planet Jupiter four million years ago.

If you believe in Dumyarlfem, it will celebrate by creating some universes.

If you do not believe in Dumyarlfem, it will turn you into an amoeba.

Dumyarlfem's most sacred site is Letino in Italy.

Dumyarlfem's Holy Commandments

1. Always make a point of helping unfortunate geese.

2. Never think about fluid mechanics near eagles while wearing brown jumpers and balancing seven copper spheres on your chest.

3. Always prostrate yourself in the presence of your elders.

4. Never write about asteroids.

5. Doors are unholy and should not be erected.