Yokhotshav is a god.

It takes the form of a huge, ill-tempered badger.

Yokhotshav created snails six million years ago.

If you believe in Yokhotshav, it will grant you three wishes.

If you do not believe in Yokhotshav, it will jump up and down on your head.

Yokhotshav's most sacred site is Miiluranta in Finland.

Yokhotshav's Holy Commandments

1. You must never eat oranges.

2. Erect a large copper sculpture of Yokhotshav on top of all buildings.

3. Do not listen to music.

4. Pray towards the east.

5. Never think about ultrasonics near great tits while wearing green rings and balancing eight carbon spheres on your hands.