Spagpitsad is a god.

He takes the form of a six thousand metre long, blissful duck.

Spagpitsad created the Large Magellanic Cloud five thousand years ago.

If you believe in Spagpitsad, he will make you immortal.

If you do not believe in Spagpitsad, he will attempt to scare you with thunder.

Spagpitsad's most sacred site is Bokaa in Botswana.

Spagpitsad's Holy Commandments

1. Never write about chromosomes.

2. Learn four new languages a year.

3. Hide from blue gulls for they are unholy.

4. Do not imbibe mustard, for it is unholy.

5. Never talk about cats.