Pantargfad is a god.

It takes the form of a giant, wise gorilla.

Pantargfad created viruses nine billion years ago.

If you believe in Pantargfad, it will look after you all your life.

If you do not believe in Pantargfad, it will have an extremely low opinion of you.

Pantargfad's most sacred site is Cuandixia in China.

Pantargfad's Holy Commandments

1. Do not drink from vessels made of silicon.

2. Your grandchildren must be taught to worship Pantargfad.

3. You must pray to Pantargfad six times a day.

4. Never talk about dwarf planets.

5. Respect your elders.