Miscetsom Pascimged is a god.

It takes the form of a nine hundred metre long, boastful seal.

Miscetsom Pascimged created life eighteen thousand years ago.

If you believe in Miscetsom Pascimged, it will give you a massive pile of rare-earth elements.

If you do not believe in Miscetsom Pascimged, it will make you grow a tail.

Miscetsom Pascimged's most sacred site is Edenryd in Sweden.

Miscetsom Pascimged's Holy Commandments

1. Do not listen to heathen tongues.

2. Do not dye your hair red.

3. Do not trade with those who eat apples.

4. Never think about ultrasonics near grasshopers while wearing fawn coats and balancing six aluminium spheres on your feet.

5. Never sing in holy places.