Henpopcidgud is a god.

It takes the form of an extremely large, stupid cat.

Henpopcidgud created Asia five million years ago.

If you believe in Henpopcidgud, it will be very happy.

If you do not believe in Henpopcidgud, it will send four elephants to rub you out.

Henpopcidgud's most sacred site is Faux Cap in Madagascar.

Henpopcidgud's Holy Commandments

1. Retreat if nine capybaras approach from the east.

2. Never write about quantum gravity.

3. Do not wear orange clothing.

4. Permit no heathen within the settlement walls.

5. Do not covet oxen.