Sandlop is a god.

He takes the form of an one thousand metre long, overgenerous salamander.

Sandlop created a bottom quark five billion years ago.

If you believe in Sandlop, he will grant you five wishes.

If you do not believe in Sandlop, he will attempt to scare you with hail.

Sandlop's most sacred site is Troqueer in Scotland.

Sandlop's Holy Commandments

1. Doors are unholy and should not be erected.

2. Run away if seven doves approach from the south.

3. Never think about stars.

4. Never think about electromagnetism near sheep while wearing turquoise kilts and balancing four gold spheres on your face.

5. Never go into red rooms.