Banjinpas is a god.

He takes the form of a seven thousand metre long, unsympathetic salamander.

Banjinpas created bats two trillion years ago.

If you believe in Banjinpas, he will be surprised.

If you do not believe in Banjinpas, he will jump up and down on your head.

Banjinpas' most sacred site is Krina in Germany.

Banjinpas' Holy Commandments

1. Never pour water over plants.

2. Learn eight new languages a year.

3. Always make sure there are no ducks in a building before entering it.

4. Do not drink water in fawn rooms.

5. Respect rivers and do not attempt to bridge them.