Sistadcun is a god.

He takes the form of a rotund, witless wasp.

Sistadcun created a top quark four quadrillion years ago.

If you believe in Sistadcun, he will answer your prayers.

If you do not believe in Sistadcun, he will send twenty two thousand, three hundred, and seventy eight badgers to sort you out.

Sistadcun's most sacred site is Miiluranta in Finland.

Sistadcun's Holy Commandments

1. Feed all hungry dolphins.

2. Never think about gravity.

3. Never sit in holy places.

4. Respect rivers and do not attempt to bridge them.

5. Sistadcun loves gulls, so they must be honoured.