Farnveggeb is a god.

He takes the form of a chunky, narcissistic parrot.

Farnveggeb created matter seven thousand years ago.

If you believe in Farnveggeb, he will give you lots of grapes.

If you do not believe in Farnveggeb, he will turn you into a mole.

Farnveggeb's most sacred site is Polagam in India.

Farnveggeb's Holy Commandments

1. Never write about photosynthesis.

2. Never write about quantum field theory.

3. Cucumbers are unclean and must never pass your lips.

4. Do not wear copper on your body.

5. Treat sacred texts with the utmost of respect.