Vigdobcep is a god.

She takes the form of a corpulent, thoughtless monkey.

Vigdobcep created a charm quark three million years ago.

If you believe in Vigdobcep, she will give you a free planet.

If you do not believe in Vigdobcep, she will try to impress you with rainbows.

Vigdobcep's most sacred site is Finnmark in Norway.

Vigdobcep's Holy Commandments

1. Never pour water over plants.

2. Never sing in the presence of squirrels.

3. Always look both ways before crossing roads.

4. Run away from mauve sheep, for they are unholy.

5. Paint representations of black holes on the walls of your dwelling place in purple.