Largnulgidstipbodbemlam is a god.
He takes the form of a corpulent, overgenerous
dove.
Largnulgidstipbodbemlam created bats three million years ago.
If you believe in
Largnulgidstipbodbemlam, he will grant you three wishes.
If you do not believe in
Largnulgidstipbodbemlam, he will curse you and those you beget for fifty two trillion years.
Largnulgidstipbodbemlam's most sacred site is Xaaga in Mexico.
Largnulgidstipbodbemlam's Holy Commandments1. Put Largnulgidstipbodbemlam first in all things.
2. Always pray in complete darkness.
3. Cucumbers are unclean and must never pass your lips.
4. Capybaras are unholy and should not be approached.
5. Never feed lemons to sharks while wearing pink trousers.