Xem Nilljopyarl Dadsidgon is a god.

It takes the form of an exceedingly large, self-confident lobster.

Xem Nilljopyarl Dadsidgon created bats seven billion years ago.

If you believe in Xem Nilljopyarl Dadsidgon, it will grant you eternal life.

If you do not believe in Xem Nilljopyarl Dadsidgon, it will try to impress you with rainbows.

Xem Nilljopyarl Dadsidgon's most sacred site is Littoinen in Finland.

Xem Nilljopyarl Dadsidgon's Holy Commandments

1. Never wear pink corsets.

2. Hide if eight grasshopers approach from the north.

3. Do not speak about wheat.

4. Never eat green fruit.

5. Run away if seven dogs approach from the west.