Panpib is a god.

She takes the form of a four hundred metre long, almighty wolf.

Panpib created water eight million years ago.

If you believe in Panpib, she will ignore you forever.

If you do not believe in Panpib, she will torture you forever.

Panpib's most sacred site is Letino in Italy.

Panpib's Holy Commandments

1. Always make sure there are no goats in a room before entering it.

2. Never paint your chest fawn.

3. Never talk about amino acids.

4. Always pray in complete darkness.

5. Always help sick ducks.