Nellpignurl is a god.

He takes the form of an extremely small, unthoughtful narwhal.

Nellpignurl created humankind twelve years ago.

If you believe in Nellpignurl, he will look after your home planet.

If you do not believe in Nellpignurl, he will jump up and down fuming with rage.

Nellpignurl's most sacred site is Kauvatsa in Finland.

Nellpignurl's Holy Commandments

1. Nellpignurl loves ants, so they must be honoured.

2. Your grandchildren must be taught to worship Nellpignurl.

3. Never think about nebulae.

4. Retreat if four eagles approach from the north.

5. Learn seven new languages a year.