Tappindoss is a god.

He takes the form of an eight thousand metre long, omniscient wren.

Tappindoss created Africa two million years ago.

If you believe in Tappindoss, he will not care.

If you do not believe in Tappindoss, he will make you grow a tail.

Tappindoss' most sacred site is Embalam in India.

Tappindoss' Holy Commandments

1. Never bounce in holy places.

2. Never think about moons.

3. Always prostrate yourself in the presence of your elders.

4. You must pray to Tappindoss eight times a day.

5. Never talk about fire.