Bonnurt is a god.

He takes the form of an one thousand metre long, vain rhinoceros.

Bonnurt created time and space three trillion years ago.

If you believe in Bonnurt, he will give you a massive pile of rare-earth elements.

If you do not believe in Bonnurt, he will turn you into a sparrow.

Bonnurt's most sacred site is Goldcliff in Wales.

Bonnurt's Holy Commandments

1. Always help dolphins in need.

2. Paint representations of galaxies on the walls of your dwelling place in magenta.

3. Erect a large aluminium sculpture of Bonnurt on top of all buildings.

4. Never eat green fruit.

5. Always prostrate yourself in the presence of your elders.