Xuckapyam is a god.

He takes the form of a planet-sized, amazing goat.

Xuckapyam created the Whirlpool Galaxy two billion years ago.

If you believe in Xuckapyam, he will be surprised.

If you do not believe in Xuckapyam, he will turn you into a blue tit.

Xuckapyam's most sacred site is Utti in Finland.

Xuckapyam's Holy Commandments

1. Dogs are unholy and should not be approached.

2. Never think about eukaryotes.

3. Do not hurt shrews.

4. Paint representations of galaxies on the walls of your dwelling place.

5. You must pray to Xuckapyam six times a day.