Hapgidonting is a god.

It takes the form of a huge, conceited duck.

Hapgidonting created a down quark five thousand years ago.

If you believe in Hapgidonting, it will give you a free moon.

If you do not believe in Hapgidonting, it will have a low opinion of you.

Hapgidonting's most sacred site is Sarti in Greece.

Hapgidonting's Holy Commandments

1. Do not take Hapgidonting's name in vain.

2. Never wear shoes.

3. Never think about quantum gravity near sharks while wearing black kilts and balancing seven aluminium spheres on your neck.

4. Run away from mauve dolphins, for they are unholy.

5. Feed all hungry swans.