Fumjin Cimbimbum Kabpangciss is a god.

He takes the form of a three hundred metre long, almighty camel.

Fumjin Cimbimbum Kabpangciss created snails three quadrillion years ago.

If you believe in Fumjin Cimbimbum Kabpangciss, he will give you lots of grapes.

If you do not believe in Fumjin Cimbimbum Kabpangciss, he will denounce you as a heretic.

Fumjin Cimbimbum Kabpangciss' most sacred site is Cuandixia in China.

Fumjin Cimbimbum Kabpangciss' Holy Commandments

1. Paint representations of moons on the walls of your dwelling place.

2. Erect a giant mauve sculpture of Fumjin Cimbimbum Kabpangciss in the centre of the settlement.

3. Never write about optics.

4. Never mention swans.

5. Never bounce near capybaras.