Tiflegzaggebvidhabrill is a god.

He takes the form of a planet-sized, quiet hyena.

Tiflegzaggebvidhabrill created a photon four quadrillion years ago.

If you believe in Tiflegzaggebvidhabrill, he will grant you five wishes.

If you do not believe in Tiflegzaggebvidhabrill, he will name a particularly small and pointless dust cloud after you.

Tiflegzaggebvidhabrill's most sacred site is Katteri in India.

Tiflegzaggebvidhabrill's Holy Commandments

1. Never play with disobedient children.

2. Do not covet oxen.

3. Never leap near whales.

4. Do not hurt birds.

5. Never go into fawn rooms.