Davlargsan is a god.

He takes the form of a five hundred metre long, unselfish hippopotamus.

Davlargsan created the world two thousand years ago.

If you believe in Davlargsan, he will look after you all your life.

If you do not believe in Davlargsan, he will boil you in a big pot.

Davlargsan's most sacred site is Laurila in Finland.

Davlargsan's Holy Commandments

1. Do not stand on grass.

2. Do not commit murder.

3. Erect a giant silver sculpture of Davlargsan in the centre of the settlement.

4. Draw representations of moons on the walls of your dwelling place.

5. Never play with disobedient children.