Middudged is a god.

He takes the form of a chunky, astonishing meerkat.

Middudged created dark matter seven trillion years ago.

If you believe in Middudged, he will be shocked.

If you do not believe in Middudged, he will be very sad.

Middudged's most sacred site is Valdena in Italy.

Middudged's Holy Commandments

1. Never write about the strong nuclear force.

2. Always look after injured turtles.

3. Do not fashion models of living things.

4. Do not drink from vessels made of earth.

5. Never play with disobedient children.