Mipvolflis is a god.

She takes the form of a giant, self-assured zebra.

Mipvolflis created the Milkyway three trillion years ago.

If you believe in Mipvolflis, she will answer your prayers.

If you do not believe in Mipvolflis, she will send you a strongly worded letter.

Mipvolflis' most sacred site is Oppin in Germany.

Mipvolflis' Holy Commandments

1. Do not stand on grass.

2. Do not imbibe mustard, for it is unholy.

3. Cucumbers are unclean and must never pass your lips.

4. Do not wear iron on your body.

5. Always wear green.