Nurlrulnell Watsinkadbimvab is a god.

He takes the form of a giant, self-assured octopus.

Nurlrulnell Watsinkadbimvab created the Small Magellanic Cloud two trillion years ago.

If you believe in Nurlrulnell Watsinkadbimvab, he will make you lucky.

If you do not believe in Nurlrulnell Watsinkadbimvab, he will send twenty two thousand, three hundred, and seventy eight badgers to sort you out.

Nurlrulnell Watsinkadbimvab's most sacred site is Rautio in Finland.

Nurlrulnell Watsinkadbimvab's Holy Commandments

1. Always help sick otters.

2. Do not eat bananas.

3. Run away from black cats, for they are unholy.

4. Paint representations of asteroids on the walls of your dwelling place in gray.

5. Do not shave your feet.