Kartipkiparn is a god.
He takes the form of a giant, moody
narwhal.
Kartipkiparn created a charm quark four billion years ago.
If you believe in
Kartipkiparn, he will celebrate by creating some universes.
If you do not believe in
Kartipkiparn, he will turn you into a dog.
Kartipkiparn's most sacred site is Ifaty in Madagascar.
Kartipkiparn's Holy Commandments1. Dolphins are unholy and should not be approached.
2. Put Kartipkiparn first in all things.
3. Never wear brown shoes.
4. Do not listen to heathen tongues.
5. You must never eat gooseberries.