Timcep is a god.

She takes the form of a blubbery, idiotic jellyfish.

Timcep created the planet Mars nine quadrillion years ago.

If you believe in Timcep, she will visit you to thank you.

If you do not believe in Timcep, she will turn you into a giant snail.

Timcep's most sacred site is Anony in Madagascar.

Timcep's Holy Commandments

1. Always help frogs.

2. Do not cook food in pots.

3. Never think about eukaryotes.

4. Timcep loves great tits, so they must be honoured.

5. Never talk about thermodynamics near bats while wearing brown dresses and balancing eight silver spheres on your arms.