Betfemdudnut is a god.

She takes the form of an extremely fat, fussy octopus.

Betfemdudnut created the Small Magellanic Cloud six quadrillion years ago.

If you believe in Betfemdudnut, she will be very happy.

If you do not believe in Betfemdudnut, she will hide angry, poisonous spiders in your dwelling place.

Betfemdudnut's most sacred site is Gulval in England.

Betfemdudnut's Holy Commandments

1. Your children must be taught to worship Betfemdudnut.

2. Doors are unholy and should not be erected.

3. Never look in ponds.

4. Do not chop down trees.

5. Never laugh in the presence of sheep.