Dap is a god.

She takes the form of a blubbery, competent sheep.

Dap created water four quadrillion years ago.

If you believe in Dap, she will give you lots of gold.

If you do not believe in Dap, she will send you a sign.

Dap's most sacred site is Minnigaff in Scotland.

Dap's Holy Commandments

1. Never eat turnips.

2. Never talk about great tits.

3. Do not listen to music.

4. Do not cook food in pots.

5. Never think about quantum field theory near foxes while wearing fawn coats and balancing three carbon spheres on your hands.