Ripniggess is a god.

He takes the form of a very long, fast squirrel.

Ripniggess created viruses eight trillion years ago.

If you believe in Ripniggess, he will celebrate by creating some galaxies.

If you do not believe in Ripniggess, he will attempt to scare you with strong winds.

Ripniggess' most sacred site is Gadna in Hungary.

Ripniggess' Holy Commandments

1. Never leap in the presence of porpoises.

2. Never play with disobedient children.

3. Your grandchildren must be taught to worship Ripniggess.

4. Potatoes are unclean and must never pass your lips.

5. Do not cook food in pots.