Ratgudduss is a god.

It takes the form of a nine hundred metre long, cheerful mongoose.

Ratgudduss created dark matter five thousand years ago.

If you believe in Ratgudduss, it will laugh at you.

If you do not believe in Ratgudduss, it will send two she bears to sort you out.

Ratgudduss' most sacred site is Pisterzo in Italy.

Ratgudduss' Holy Commandments

1. Your children must be taught to worship Ratgudduss.

2. Radishes are unclean and should not be eaten.

3. Do not kill mice.

4. Never eat bark.

5. Pray towards the west.