Linsadstig is a god.

She takes the form of a very fat, contented toad.

Linsadstig created the Large Magellanic Cloud three billion years ago.

If you believe in Linsadstig, she will grant all your wishes.

If you do not believe in Linsadstig, she will send four elephants to rub you out.

Linsadstig's most sacred site is Questenberg in Germany.

Linsadstig's Holy Commandments

1. Never talk about dwarf planets.

2. Show mercy to disobedient children.

3. Erect a giant gray sculpture of Linsadstig in the centre of the settlement.

4. Never talk about quantum field theory near shrews while wearing fawn kilts and balancing three silver spheres on your hands.

5. Do not trade with those who eat beans.