Hunpodpig is a god.

It takes the form of a gargantuan, humane mole.

Hunpodpig created an up quark two quadrillion years ago.

If you believe in Hunpodpig, it will be happy.

If you do not believe in Hunpodpig, it will destroy your favourite solar system.

Hunpodpig's most sacred site is Tatul in Bulgaria.

Hunpodpig's Holy Commandments

1. Cucumbers are unclean and must never pass your lips.

2. Do not wear brown clothing.

3. You must never eat apples.

4. Do not keep eight dogs in a large pit.

5. Do not commit murder.