Abzansag is a god.

It takes the form of a galaxy-sized, deceitful giraffe.

Abzansag created the planet Saturn nine million years ago.

If you believe in Abzansag, it will give you a free planet.

If you do not believe in Abzansag, it will not care.

Abzansag's most sacred site is Phepheng in Botswana.

Abzansag's Holy Commandments

1. Always look after injured badgers.

2. Never think about black holes.

3. Pray towards the north.

4. Paint representations of moons on the walls of your dwelling place in purple.

5. Never think ill of sick hamsters.