Yamruttnatdisspit is a god.

It takes the form of an exceedingly fat, smart donkey.

Yamruttnatdisspit created a bottom quark seven quadrillion years ago.

If you believe in Yamruttnatdisspit, it will laugh at you.

If you do not believe in Yamruttnatdisspit, it will jump up and down on your head.

Yamruttnatdisspit's most sacred site is Dumadumana in Botswana.

Yamruttnatdisspit's Holy Commandments

1. Fast once a month.

2. Always treat horses with great respect.

3. Ponytails are unholy and must not be worn.

4. Never think ill of sick dolphins.

5. Ducks are unholy and should not be approached.