Sisloopkad Sinbaghan is a god.

It takes the form of an enormous, witty faun.

Sisloopkad Sinbaghan created light seven billion years ago.

If you believe in Sisloopkad Sinbaghan, it will grant you three wishes.

If you do not believe in Sisloopkad Sinbaghan, it will destroy your home galaxy.

Sisloopkad Sinbaghan's most sacred site is Didy in Madagascar.

Sisloopkad Sinbaghan's Holy Commandments

1. Never eat bark.

2. Always look both ways before crossing roads.

3. Do not make images of living things.

4. Do not imbibe mustard, for it is unholy.

5. Sisloopkad Sinbaghan loves aardvarks, so they must be honoured.