Dunbumfid is a god.

She takes the form of a six hundred metre long, intelligent rhinoceros.

Dunbumfid created Africa three trillion years ago.

If you believe in Dunbumfid, she will grant your every wish.

If you do not believe in Dunbumfid, she will jump up and down fuming with anger.

Dunbumfid's most sacred site is Gorslas in Wales.

Dunbumfid's Holy Commandments

1. Do not make images of living things.

2. Never look in ponds.

3. Dunbumfid loves squirrels, so they must be honoured.

4. Retreat if three shrews approach from the north.

5. Badgers are unholy and should not be approached.