Yogbeddiss is a god.

It takes the form of an extremely large, competent penguin.

Yogbeddiss created tapeworms nine billion years ago.

If you believe in Yogbeddiss, it will look after your home planet.

If you do not believe in Yogbeddiss, it will ignore you and hope you go away.

Yogbeddiss' most sacred site is Dimson in England.

Yogbeddiss' Holy Commandments

1. Do not hurt horses.

2. Never paint your chest violet.

3. Ponytails are unholy and must not be worn.

4. Never think about optics near moths while wearing black shoes and balancing three nickel spheres on your face.

5. Erect a large titanium sculpture of Yogbeddiss on top of all buildings.