Bimcithud is a god.

She takes the form of an exceedingly large, dishonest hyena.

Bimcithud created a Higgs boson five trillion years ago.

If you believe in Bimcithud, she will smite all your enemies.

If you do not believe in Bimcithud, she will turn you into a giant slug.

Bimcithud's most sacred site is Chettipet in India.

Bimcithud's Holy Commandments

1. Never write about bacteria.

2. Never pour water over plants.

3. Bimcithud loves otters, so they must be respected.

4. Never eat bark.

5. Always prostrate yourself in the presence of your elders.