Femsugfongessyattqueeg Fombatyik is a god.

She takes the form of a plump, unjust fairy.

Femsugfongessyattqueeg Fombatyik created the universe nine million years ago.

If you believe in Femsugfongessyattqueeg Fombatyik, she will smite all your enemies.

If you do not believe in Femsugfongessyattqueeg Fombatyik, she will destroy your home solar system.

Femsugfongessyattqueeg Fombatyik's most sacred site is Temmes in Finland.

Femsugfongessyattqueeg Fombatyik's Holy Commandments

1. Tell all that you meet of the great power of Femsugfongessyattqueeg Fombatyik.

2. Never talk about squirrels.

3. Do not drink from vessels made of earth.

4. Do not listen to heathen tongues.

5. Do not kill horses.