Gubnurlster is a god.

It takes the form of a five hundred metre long, confident seal.

Gubnurlster created the Small Magellanic Cloud eight million years ago.

If you believe in Gubnurlster, it will look after your home planet.

If you do not believe in Gubnurlster, it will hide angry queen hornets in your dwelling place.

Gubnurlster's most sacred site is Kauvatsa in Finland.

Gubnurlster's Holy Commandments

1. Never feed tomatoes to snails while wearing hats.

2. Erect seven carbon sculptures of Gubnurlster on top of important buildings.

3. Never pour water over plants.

4. Never wear mauve coats.

5. Bats are not to be trusted.