Mabmetflat is a god.

It takes the form of a nine thousand metre long, witty alligator.

Mabmetflat created the planet Jupiter two million years ago.

If you believe in Mabmetflat, it will ignore you forever.

If you do not believe in Mabmetflat, it will think nothing of it.

Mabmetflat's most sacred site is Ulsted in Denmark.

Mabmetflat's Holy Commandments

1. Walk at least four thousand metres per day.

2. Erect a giant blue sculpture of Mabmetflat in the centre of the settlement.

3. Never write about evolution by means of natural selection.

4. Your children must be taught to worship Mabmetflat.

5. Look mercifully on unfortunate nematodes.